Today is the end of the half-term, so that means only half a term of work left, plus 10 days holiday.....
I've been in a strange space these last few days, so much on my mind, so much to do, so little time to do it and I can't find the motivation to do any of it. Moving house always gets me like this, even though this time I have more notice than ever before ... very odd ....
I should be up and around packing stuff, but all I want to do is sit in front of the pooter and veg and play mindless computer games. Nothing seems to be motivating me to do anything else.
I feel very depressed and scared about what is to come next and have the feeling that I'm not in control - I like to be in control of what is happening next and I'm not, so will have to hope that the divine entity knows what they are up to.
Right now I'm sitting here thinking that maybe I should have some lunch and then I'm thinking can't be arsed, so will either sit on my butt till Mr SketchWeasel will get it or go without. Not a good state to be in... Torpor has most definately set in.
I keep looking round my office/bed/sitting room and thinking .. Christ I've got to pack this lot and then thinking, what's the point - there's still 7 weeks.....
Only 7 weeks .. shit ....
I wrote this ....
Depressed and Down
I wore my crown,
of thorns.
Tight around my head
My fingers crushed
into my palm
curly crescents
till they bled
Numb but in pain
Drowning in my own sorrow
I want a day
not just any day
a day
that's like
Tomorrow
That's about the limit of my productivity today ....
ps .. Finally have a diagnosis for my daughter ... Specific Learning Disability and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.
Now we can start to do something pro-active about it ..
